How often to you find yourself thinking that? Me? Every few months. Why? Denial maybe? I've no idea. In this day and age I want to be everything and do everything. The problem? I want it all now!!!
I really being 8 and deciding that I was going to grow up and be a Journalist. *looks around* Clearly, that didn't happen. I kept that hope all through public school and right into high school -- up until Law, then I wanted to do something with criminals.
Fast forward to college and although I was surrounded by them, I did not have any involvement with them. This isn't a bad thing. I think I became so overwhelmed with all this computer stuff I figured it would be insane to go into the field of criminology etc when the computer age was still 'growing up' and was going to eventually take over the world.
So, computer programming/systems analyst is where I went. I fell in love for awhile there, and then had some issues in my personal life going on which ultimately led to me fucking everything up from a school standpoint (and piled on lots of debt) to which I then left. I wasn't gone for long, but when I came back I went into Marketing. Everything in marketing seemed like so much fun. Brands. Image. Hands on. Promotions. Presence. I was bought and jumped in.
Again we fast forward a shit ton of years (I measure this in anything longer than 5) and I meet the man of my dreams. Well, not dreams, cause I've known this little bastard since he was 11/12 and told him them we were going to get married and have babies. I married him alright, but we opted to do the kids first and then got married. Ass backwards but I wouldn't change a thing.
So we get together, which ultimately leads to me NOT moving abroad to the UK to study/play/party/work for a year because let's face it, who wouldn't want to do that, or my other consideration which was moving to Australia to re-explore computers again. During this time I am working for NYF in the mall, move on to some other managerial positions in other stores while I'm trying to figure out exactly what it is I am wanting to do.
I spend the next 2 years still contemplating until I become so overwhelmed by all my potential options that I finally give up and focus on surviving until I get it. Bring on babies over the course of a few years at which time I desperately start trying to find something successful to do from home because daycare costs are RIDONKULOUS. What is the point in putting your children in childcare at a rate of $45 (on avg) a day PER KID for whichever aren't in school yet Monday through Friday while you work? By the time I spent money on gas and everything else associated with having a full time job and getting kids to and from daycare I think I was making a profit of $40 after taxes. NO THANKS! I might as well stay home, raise my children MYSELF and find something to do from there for a profit of $40.
I've done Avon, I've done Partylite, I've done other small things here and there but nothing to really keep me interested and happy. I even did some childcare myself for others at a reduced rate etc, but I never did want to be a pre-school teacher so that didn't last long.
Now as the kids are nearing the everyday all day Monday through Friday I'm beginning to spend more and more time thinking about what I want to do. Right now I run The Mad Batters with my sister making cupcakes, cakes and all sorts of other goodies etc. I recently became a Victorian Pleasure Parties specialist however what a shit time I chose to do that. All my eureka women are going through some fairly traumatic things right now and can't hold parties so I don't have any orders, and I do not have the funding to go run a national campaign to generate some leads etc so I'm calling that quits for now too as I won't meet any of my requirements for staying active which is a shame but it is what it is. I help a friend out doing leads for his marketing MONSTER at Gabzebo (this thing is kinda da bomb, just saying). Otherwise you can find me being the regular activity mom, whether it be gymnastics, ballet, taekwondo or swimming.
Last but certainly not least I am the entity that is PunchDrunkMum. I am a blogger, a media addict, a realist, a ridiculously outgoing butterfly now developing PunchDrunkMum Media and getting excited for everything that it will stand for. I am rolling all my ventures into one and working off that. I am in my 30's and I still haven't been able to figure out exactly what it is I wanna be when I grow up, but you know what, I think it's ok that I can't decide. Why? Well, it keeps it interesting and doors will never be closed for me, just more opportunity as I move ahead.
I have a few new ideas up my sleeve, but I know I have all the time in the world to figure it out.
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